If the married couple then the adjustment process will return to the starting point. In a marriage bond may appear small surprises about the nature or habits of couples who will not be found on the engagement or during courtship. Some people there are who hope that some bad habits before marriage may disappear after your lover to your husband or wife. But what he found were even worse habits extending the pair.
Actually no one can change their original properties even if the person was married. Even if signs of incompatibility appear it is because you and your spouse have a house, and then would not want your partner will show the character or nature of the original, and also some of the habits that do not appear in courtship can be a problem. This must be understood by each partner.
The difference could be caused by differences in character, nature, and general habits can be a problem in terms of financial management, the division of roles in the household, receipt or placement of yourself in your partner’s extended family, intimate relationship between you and your partner, sharing time between jobs and home, until a chance mingle with your friends. And finally to the birth of your first child, then the pattern of childcare can be a problem.
Adjustment process between you and your spouse do need to unite the struggle for these differences and also in order to reconcile the interests that arise. Surely here is required mutual understanding between both parties as well as through the generosity of intense communication.
Although the adjustment process will continue to occur throughout the age of marriage, but basic things such as methods of financial management, parenting children and other things as mentioned earlier should be completed in the first year of marriage. Why should be completed in the first year of marriage? because if this allowed, then it will bring new problems in your marriage; and of course going to threaten the harmony of your relationship between you and your partner.
For that you should discuss the differences that exist and immediately do the adjustments in order to find a way out which is best for you and your partner. By doing this adjustment would be a good momentum for each party to know each other, understand each other better partner physically, emotionally, habits, interests, hobbies and more. If you and your partner can pass it well then to put the following years will form the solid foundation again.
Introspection and Tolerance
Actually marriage is a process of cooperation from both parties defended. So you have to understand, how to seek domestic harmony? Love alone is not sufficient to deal with all problems. Much needed maturity in attitude, emotions, and maturity of thought, and also willing to tolerate and have a healthy communication.
If in your domestic life conflict occurs, then identify the source of conflict. Make it as a suggestion for you and your spouse to be more introspection and return to the concept of early marriage. Missed opportunities are always in every conflict can be resolved and could be discussed without any emotion, by looking for the right time.
When you discuss, you should not personally attack your partner, but you have to focus on problems within the framework of affection. If all issues can be communicated well and made a collective agreement, then the conflicts that arise can be reduced or eliminated.